March 30, 2009 § Leave a comment
What’s up with artists sampling other people’s music nowadays? On the radio the other day I heard Sugar by Flo Rida, which uses part of Blue by Eiffel 65. Flo Rida’s other single, Right Round, also uses bits from another song, You Spin Me Round by Dead or Alive, although I prefer the Eiffel 65 version [Flo Rida’s lyrics are nasty!]. And it’s no secret that T.I.’s song Live Your Life samples the beginning of Dragostea Din Tei by O-Zone.
Although it might be nice to revisit past pop hits, I give them negative props for being unoriginal.
Speaking of music, I am currently loving Lady GaGa’s music video for LoveGame [it’s very sexual. Probably NSFW]:
March 25, 2009 § Leave a comment
The other day I watched the new music video for Ciara’s Love Sex Magic featuring Justin Timberlake, and although I don’t love the song [it sounds too much like JT’s Senorita to me, and everything is too high-pitched], the video is fabulous:
The sexual tension between Ciara and JT is palpable, and frankly, much more believable than that of JT and Rihanna [though of course the song’s content differs]. My my, C looks fine in this music video. She’s been on a roll lately; I love her duet with Enrique Iglesias, in which the two singers also connect rather well.
Apparently some people aren’t happy about Ciara cramping on Beyoncé’s style, but I don’t really care. Others are irate about JT’s treatment of women, which rouses a little more concern but it’s still kind of a stretch. Both are interesting viewpoints, however.
March 25, 2009 § Leave a comment
Last night, CH and I had the mind-blowing pleasure of seeing Lady GaGa perform at Chicago’s House of Blues, and it was worth all of the $73 I spent buying the two tickets on Ebay [plus the $15.20 I had to spend to express mail the tickets to my house after idiotically forgetting them in Missouri when packing for spring break].
Although I wanted to arrive an hour before the doors opened, scheduling conflicts and slow public transportation caused us to get there at exactly 6PM, when they started letting people in. The line was long but not horrendously so, and I was surprised to see that there were many who were older than us — I’m not sure who GaGa’s target audience is but I did expect to see more teenagers. The majority of the attendees were definitely either women or gay men, although there were a number of guys accompanying their girlfriends/wives or parents chaperoning a group of girls. There seemed to be a few hetero guys with other hetero guys, and maybe even some middle-aged folk without kids, but I couldn’t be sure.
Unfortunately, security took CH’s camera at the door so I don’t have any pictures, although we weren’t close enough to get any good ones — we stood right at the back of the mosh pit area on the steps so that we could see over the heads of all the tall dudes standing near the front [no fair!].
March 23, 2009 § Leave a comment
Knowing what’s right makes the wrong even more heartbreaking.
After dinner today I went for a walk around the neighborhood to clear my head. Even though spring break has just begun, I’ve already had more than enough chaos. I suppose even though my brother is growing taller and my parents are growing older, nothing at home really changes. A smooth facade is easily shattered by the obstinacy of an adolescent boy and the impatience of two incapable parents. I feel like I have enough experience to become an actual family counselor.
And let’s not forget the BU, as much as I would like to. It was awkward seeing [and avoiding] him yesterday. This afternoon, Nick and Norah’s Infinite Playlist was playing on TV — I had zero interest in this when it came out, but J watched it sometime this semester and loved it, and he was keen on us watching it together. So I watched it today, partly in honor of him, and partly to see what the big deal was about.
As I suspected, the film was just another frivolous teen romance. I mean, it wasn’t disgustingly cheesy, but it wasn’t much more than two teenagers trying to find “love” [or something]. And the supporting characters were completely one-dimensional and uninteresting.
Anyway, I walked from my house to the elementary school playground and watched the sunset while listening to sad songs on my iPod [which is on the verge of dying…not good]. My favorite: Piano Man by Brandy. How true these words:
Play me a song about heartache / I promise I could sing every word
But God met me as I slouched in the swing, the wind blowing my hair into disheveled tangles. And through my tears, I gave it up to Him. I’m not going to let the questions plague me anymore — does he still love me? If not, why not? Could we still end up together? [How could he be so heartless?]
It doesn’t matter anymore. What we shared is gone, and my future is not with him. I can have peace about it now. As for family problems, well, that will take much longer to clean up. But I know God is there.
On my walk back, Another Heart Calls by the All American Rejects came on. Although not in the full context of the lyrics, these lines stood one to me:
Everything that matters breaks in two / Say it’s true / I’ll never ask for anyone but you
I looked up into the sky’s radiant clouds and prayed those words to God. I hope to never forget what He has brought me through.
February 27, 2009 § 1 Comment
On Wednesday I had the chance to speak with an older female IV leader about the one overwhelming aspect of my life right now, and by God’s grace she was able to speak truth into my life, revealing some things that I didn’t even know I was struggling with. It helped, but the hurt only deepened once I understood it, and is now giving way to anger.
Unlike despair, in which I can wallow miserably, anger makes me restless. I want to throw things, to get out. I want to go home. I want to confront people. But most of all, I just want my life back. But some people have to go and make things complicated…
I also wish I could stop pretending to be fine. Some of it is self-wrought, a defense mechanism because talking about it is painful even when I laugh about it. Some of it is caused by the fact that the world moves on, and even my closest friends can’t understand what I’m going through. Sometimes it’s not pretending, but most of the time I still carry around a darkness that I cannot yet release.
I can’t stop listening to this song:
February 22, 2009 § Leave a comment
Listening To: Nicholas Tse (謝霆鋒) – 谢谢你的爱 1999
别问最爱我的人 / 伤我有多深
Who would’ve known that I could identify so closely with Jon Arbuckle? I’m still a little heartbroken and very, very sick, and these are perfect representations of how I feel. [Taken from Garfield Minus Garfield.]
February 18, 2009 § Leave a comment
It’s still hard to believe that it’s over. There are no words to adequately describe the depth of hopelessness and hurt within me.
The deep abyss of agony has become more of a dull ache. I can’t look at his face without dry-heaving: not wanting to vomit, but wanting to cry. Or die. [I believe there is a little bit of masochism involved.]
But what’s the use? It’s over. I laid in bed for a day, skipping my classes so I could try to sleep longer, or upon waking, cry periodically for what was lost: a time of mourning for something that had died.
I see other couples who have couple-y Facebook pictures, or who walk around holding hands, and reminisce on how I used to be that smug and comfortable too. But now they only serve as reminders of what could have been. I feel a little angry looking at all the non-Christian couples I know who are happy and planning futures together, and I wonder, if they can stay together, why did we fall apart? It’s not fair, God; it’s not fair.