Mark Your Calendars

May 12, 2009 § Leave a comment

Out now, in Asia: Shinjuku Incident

I don’t see a release date for the US, which is bothersome but ultimately unsurprising. I love Jackie Chan, although I don’t like seeing him in serious roles because that usually means something bad is going to happen to him [New Police Story was pretty scarring].

June 24, 2009: Transformers 2

Vodpod videos no longer available.

The whole traveling-the-world-looking-at-obscure-symbols thing is reminiscent of National Treasure 2, which wasn’t as good as the first one despite making lots of money. Anyhow, the plot screams CLICHÉ while the action looks fantastic as expected.

September 4, 2009: Gamers

A movie about video gaming? Intriguing. A movie about video games that features sexy Gerard Butler and awesome Michael C. Hall? YES. I could really do without the love story, though. Yes, people like being in love, and having something to live for, but most of the time I feel like that gets in the way of the action.

December 11, 2009: The Princess and the Frog

I can’t wait for this movie! This newfangled 3D stuff is fine and dandy, but I’ve been waiting forever for a decent 2D movie to come out. Why couldn’t they give Rapunzel the same treatment?

The only complaint I have about this one so far is that, well, before seeing the trailer, I didn’t know that the Princess [really? A princess from America? How will they make this feasible?] actually turns into a frog. I hope that doesn’t make up a huge part of the movie, because frankly, frogs are not attractive. And yes, I did watch the Brave Frog over and over as a child, but things were different back then. These days, I don’t have the time to sit through a movie with animals if they’re not going to be paralyzingly adorable. Life is short! Give me more kittens! Also, the frog-with-a-French-accent has been DONE [how could they top Jon Bob?].

Been Eating Dog Food

May 9, 2009 § 1 Comment

Ever since I was a young child, I’ve wondered what dog food tastes like. I should probably explain that my stomach is very easily visually stimulated, and literally anything can make me hungry, from the flowers on the tree outside of JZ’s apartment shaped like shortbread cookies to that scene in Lion King when Scar is taunting his three top minions with that zebra leg [I love watching animals eat]. I am always hungry.

I’ve never been interested in trying kibble, but dog treats [ie. those Milkbone things] always looked like fun, bone-shaped cookies. I recall having a dream many years ago that I actually tried one, but couldn’t taste anything in my dream.

These memories arose when I read that apparently, liver paté tastes like dog food. No joke.

Now, everyone I’ve met in college has been disgusted by the thought of eating liver. Although it’s definitely an acquired taste, I don’t think it’s fair of them to turn up their nose at something that’s really not that disgusting compared to brain or bugs — then again, Americans seem to be less imaginative about what they consume, probably because the only Americans who have starved were the Pilgrims and so were never really forced into such desperate measures, and that’s because they simply did not know how to grow crops. Well, I suppose people starved during the Great Depression too; I’ve heard tales of eating shoe leather [now THAT is atrocious].

Anyway, I love liver. I’ve been fed the stuff from a young age, and I definitely prefer it over the chewiness of heart or kidney. Chicken liver is good, and that’s the kind I have most commonly [I bought a tub of the stuff last semester and created some interesting results], although at one restaurant in China last summer, I was reminded of how absolutely delicious pork liver is. I would love the opportunity to try duck or goose liver, although the method of procuring those livers really makes me shudder.

In Chinese Civilizations class earlier this week, the prof was talking to us about Chinese cuisine. While describing either Mongolian or Sichuan hot pot, he mentioned trying pig brain and cow stomach, much to the distaste of my classmates [I’ve had the latter but I will NOT eat brain. It simply does not seem delicious in any way]. One classmate pointed out that another name for cow stomach is tripe, to which my prof added that changing the name does change one’s impression of a food. Foie gras, escargot, and caviar are all similar examples. Alas, Chinese people do not, to my knowledge, disguise their bizarre foods with foreign names, so some of the stuff inevitably ends up sounding gross to some.

I remember eating snail when we visited Dalian maybe six years ago — I had to extract it from the shell with a toothpick, but it wasn’t unpleasant. I must have developed extra inhibitions since then because I’m not sure I’d be able to eat it if I were faced with it today. I’ve also never been able to eat frog’s legs — I can’t even stand looking at them. If they taste like chicken, why not just eat chicken? I don’t want my chicken to come in the shape of little legs that I can imagine hopping around, attached to a frog [NOT delicious-looking as far as animals go]. I would also never eat bugs, although the ones that Timon and Pumbaa devoured in the Lion King movies really did look tasty.

New Music Videos

May 7, 2009 § Leave a comment

Although I don’t enjoy the path that Kanye West has taken with his latest album, I still watch his new music videos in hopes of finding something good. This is his most recent:

Kanye West — Amazing

Vodpod videos no longer available.

My first impression is that it looks like the video that plays in the background of every song on a bad karaoke machine — beautiful green or oceanside landscapes, usually with a woman walking around looking at flowers — AKA boring. The song itself is repetitive, and if Kanye writes his own stuff, he really needs to get back into rapping, because singing “It’s amazing” ten times in the same monotone is not even as interesting as the music that plays when you’re being put on hold.

I also thought it was amusing that Young Jeezy raps for part of the song. I know that sometimes rappers like to collaborate with one another, although when rappers duet it’s usually with a vocalist, a group to which Kanye really does not belong. Why couldn’t he just rap for his own song? I miss the way he spits out rhymes. I do enjoy the piano & tribal drum mix, although I could do without the animalistic yelps in the background.

Katy Perry also has a new music video out, and I like watching hers as much as Kanye’s because I find them both to be rather attractive people and interesting to look at.

Katy Perry — Waking Up In Vegas

Vodpod videos no longer available.

What happened to the thumping bass that I fell in love with from “I Kissed A Girl”? With each new single, Katy Perry’s songs seem to become more banal, kind of like Kelly Clarkson’s new music. These lyrics are uninspired — how cliché is the idea of getting crazy in Las Vegas? After it’s been dragged out into a romantic comedy feature film, it should really be laid to rest. Even the video is boring. Katy’s dude is ugly, and while she looks as wide-eyed and kooky as ever, nothing much happens [although I did chuckle when she surreptitiously eats somebody else’s leftovers].

What The FKCU?!

May 6, 2009 § Leave a comment

I almost had an aneurysm when I flipped to the third page of June’s Nintendo Power and saw an advertisement for this:

[“Your stylist holds the key to popularity.” ?!!??!?!??!?? Unbelievable.]

It’s called Drama Queens, for Nintendo DS. The ad said:

Fashion, Guys, Career…like, how can one girl deal?

Chelsi stole my boyfriend but Hayden is totally crushing on me — must be because of the little black dress I bought after landing a promotion at Fashion Boutique. Step aside, ladies! The competition to be the most popular queen diva is fierce in this ultra-dramatic 3D board game!

Play in four environments from the shopping mall to the fashion runway

Show up to three friends that you’re most popular in two multiplayer modes

Juggle boyfriends, best friends and promotions around Drama Spaces

I can barely contain my outrage, but I will try to express it without resorting to expletives.

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