Let Me Count The Ways To FML
April 2, 2010 § 1 Comment
How many ways could what appeared to be a carefully-planned Wednesday go wrong?
This was my original schedule:
7AM alarm goes off
7:30 actually wake up
8:25 go to bus stop half an hour earlier than usual
9AM arrive in the office to help Paris, our creative director, with the equipment/clothing for today’s photoshoot, which is extra important because neither the fashion editor nor editor’s assistant will be there
4PM I always leave early on Wednesdays because I usually have class in the afternoon
5:30 play tennis back on campus
What actually happened is a long and harrowing tale that might require a pint or two to tell if I actually drank beer.
9:08 “Laura?” Nadia cautiously says as I open my eyes to sunlight. “I think you overslept.” OHGODFMLSHITTTTTTTTT “Uh-oh” is all I utter before jumping out of bed to call Paris, who seems slightly peeved but is polite as usual. He leaves the office without me, naturally, and I clean up as quickly as possible.
9:23 I decide to take a taxi to work instead of waiting for the bus. It costs 12 times as much, but money is the last thing on my mind as I sit in the backseat trying to ward off a panic attack. Awful scenarios race through my mind. Should I stay late as an apology? But then I would have to abandon tennis plans. But I was the one who made the tennis court reservation, which means I’d have to pay the cancellation fee. I settle for texting my tennis buddies to warn them about possible nixing of the schedule. The taxi ride costs $62HK.
9:44 Paris has left a steam press and two bags of clothing for me to bring to Tsuen Wan, an obscure location across the harbor where I have never been. No worries; he says his taxi driver had no problem recognizing the address, so I head downstairs to the taxi stand right outside our building. Not only do I not speak Cantonese [& therefore can’t even try to explain where this unknown address is], none of them are willing to cross the harbor. I have to walk two blocks [carrying all the stuff] to the “common taxi stand,” where the driver also doesn’t recognize the address. At least he’s willing to try.
10:30 I am so relieved to arrive at the correct place that I forget to ask for a receipt from the taxi driver to claim the charge. THIS MEANS THAT I HAVE TO ABSORB THE $225 TAXI FEE. F M L SO HARD AFTER I REALIZE THIS.
10:42 The flat we’re using is brand new and absolutely beautiful. Our model of the day, celebrated HK jewelry designer Michelle Ong, won’t arrive until the afternoon. Paris is there with the two photographers, and he sends me upstairs to the bathroom to steam press the dresses. Was I supposed to research how to use one of these things before going to work? It was literally the first time I ever held one. I figure out how to use it eventually, and pray that the expensive clothing can’t get ruined by the hot water I’m somehow streaking all over.
11:38 I haven’t eaten anything all day, and my insides are still unsettled from the morning’s stress. I drink half of the chocolate soymilk I brought from home [I can never finish an entire carton for some reason]. I called the HKU sports center to inquire about the tennis courts. Unfortunately, the facking HKU system, like everything else in HK, doesn’t allow for any flexibility. Check-ins must be made in person [can’t reserve for someone else], and any cancellations less than 24 hours in advance incur a fee of $50. Could I possibly waste any more money today?!? I put off the decision for now.
11:54 Michelle’s team is arriving soon, and Paris sends me off to procure “sandwiches” for lunch. How is it that we were in the one place in HK where it is impossible to find western restaurants apart from McDonald’s and Pizza Hut? Even the security guards and concierge can’t help. The task fails before it even begins. Despite this, I bravely clutch the $1000 bill that Paris hands me and head off to the “downtown” area.
12:03 They were right. There is literally nothing. I wander around for 90 minutes; what wouldn’t I do for a Super Wal-Mart at this point?? I consider buying some bread & lunch meat from Park&Shop but eventually pick up some sandwiches from 7-11 and salad + tuna pizza roll things from Pizza Hut, the most portable food I can find.
2:15 Everybody is famished, but rich thin people don’t eat food meant for commoners. “It’s worse than plane food,” Michelle’s assistant Shaz keeps repeating to her boss. WELL YEAH IF YOU KEEP SAYING IT IS. I’m a college student! We eat anything!
2:33 I’m still too unsettled to ingest anything, so I guzzle a can of 7-Up and make friends with the makeup artist, a man twice my age [but is dressed like someone in his 20s]. I overhear Michelle talking with Paris & Shaz about her mainland customers, who are “rough” and just paw their jewelry out of their purses without any appreciation for details. I finally realize that yes, Hong Kong people indeed look down on other Chinese people as if we’re barbarians.
3:51 The photoshoot is going well [and Michelle is beautiful], so Paris allows me to leave early along with the steam press and dresses we already used. Huray! I can finally play tennis after a month of inactivity!
7:12 After duking it out on the court for an hour with Amy, I decide to tag along with her to the HKU tennis team practice at the other tennis courts, which are a 45-minute walk away [she is also just visiting them for the first time]. As we walk out of the canteen, we pass the guy that I met at tennis club two months ago that I thought was really good-looking, and he actually recognizes me this time [I ran into him at the grocery store too but I wasn’t disgustingly sweaty so I had to remind him who I was]. Naturally, he’s dressed to play and has his racket in hand. Sadly, I haven’t been able to stalk him out on Facebook — how am I supposed to work with a name like “Lock”? “Loq“? “Loque“? I have no idea.
7:22 While waiting at the bus stop with a bunch of other guys dressed in their hall track jackets, “Lock” also arrives but doesn’t see me. Tennis team practice is at 7:30. I swear these guys are all going there. I’m feeling intimidated, especially because I’ve seen “Lock” play before and my amateur skills really can’t compare. Literally 30 buses pass us before the correct one, #10, comes. ALL OF THE GUYS at the bus stop, including “Lock,” who came after we did, pile onto the mini-bus. Amy and I are left to languish, though he finally sees me though the window as the bus leaves, and I wave forlornly.
7:43 Twenty minutes later, another #10 minibus arrives. Lo & behold, “Lock” is already at the tennis courts. “Oh,” he says to me in Mandarin. “I didn’t know you were coming.” He sounds partly surprised and partly apologetic [maybe for stealing my BUS?]. Anyway, Amy and I end up only playing each other because the team is really good [just won the championship again], and I feel much better about life after the strenuous exercise.
9:30 We wait outside for an unprecedented 30 minutes for a #10 minibus, but it never comes. Instead, we get on the #58 [never took it before] in an attempt to follow a fellow student. We also follow him off the bus and down the street until it starts to look familiar … All in all, an appropriate way to end the most troublesome day of the semester so far.
Misadventures In 深圳
March 29, 2010 § 1 Comment
Thanks to mother’s foresight, I acquired a multiple-entry visa in Chicago and was therefore all set to trek to and from mainland China without having to spend time and loads of money applying for a mere double-entry visa here in Hong Kong like my friends do because China hates America. So far, I’ve taken advantage of my freedom three times, which I’ve separated into a three-part tale.
Episode I
The last week of January, I visited Shenzhen on a whim with a guy I had only known for two weeks [if even]. He was going to visit some friends [Chinese exchange students] he had met back in California who were going to the city during their winter break, and I didn’t have class on Wednesdays so I tagged along.
We departed on Tuesday evening and planned to meet Mike’s friend Edmund [from CUHK] and spend the night in Shenzhen at a hostel that his friends had already booked. From HKU, the journey to the border takes almost an hour and a half, CUHK is pretty close to it:
Not more than five minutes after meeting Edmund at 上水 [Sheng Shui] and right as the train to take us to mainland pulled into the station, Mike realized that he had left his passport in his desk. UNBELIEVABLE. He ran off, leaving Edmund and me to bond for the next three hours as we awaited his return. Thankfully, Edmund was a nice fellow, and we got along pretty well as he and I wandered around the area near the MTR station.
Unfortunately, the border closes at midnight, and the last train left before Mike could possibly have returned. What to do, what to do… We considered spending the night at karaoke and catching the first train, but eventually decided to stay at Edmund’s university instead, since there was no point in going all the way back to HKU.
It turned out that Edmund lived in an all-male building. When we first arrived before Mike had reached us, a gaggle of guys were in the lobby [the outside of which was all glass] having a ping pong tournament. I tried to be inconspicuous as Edmund had a short discussion with one of them and the rest stared at me, wondering about the girl he was trying to bring home at midnight. The two of us took a walk around the lovely [and more expansive] campus as we waited for Mike [and the ping pong tournament to end].
Edmund’s building didn’t have security at night, but we still entered sneakily just in case my presence aroused too much suspicion. While talking with Edmund’s roommate, I found out that he had actually BEEN to Naperville [my ‘hood] before because his aunt & uncle own Trudy’s Flowers, which I drive past ALL THE TIME. Absolutely insane.
The boys’ bathroom! I definitely didn’t pee that night.
That night I slept in Edmund’s bed [which was more comfortable than my own] while he and Mike spent the night playing ping pong in the lobby, resulting in 15 minutes of sleep for both fools. We woke up at 5AM and left at 6AM with Edmund’s friend Sandy, who apparently had stayed up the whole night due to relationship troubles and wanted to join us on our excursion.
The process of crossing the border was quite complicated. I had to show my passport at four different stations, some of which were on different floors. Mainland China definitely has a distinct smell, which I noticed almost immediately. Ah, the fragrance of the motherland! I was so glad to be surrounded by Mandarin instead of Cantonese and simplified instead of traditional characters. We met Mike and Edmund’s friends, three lovely girls studying in southern China, and ate a deliciously cheap brunch before setting off to do some shopping.
Francis & Echo — I wish China hadn’t banned Facebook :(
Me, Daisy, Mike, Edmund, Sandy
I bought a pair of Adidas sneakers [110RMB] and some Kpop paraphernalia [alas, they had very few SHINee products] in the large shopping center we visited. I didn’t think much of the clothing styles I saw, and the quality looked even less remarkable than Argyle Center in Mongkok. Everything was so cheap! I bought two fresh starfruit on a stick on the street for only 1RMB [15 cents USD]!
Shenzhen has a reputation for being dangerous, but so far each time I’ve gone, strangers have been helpful and nobody has been robbed. There are definitely beggars and dirty places, but every urban area is going to have those.
After a yummy seafood lunch, our group found a massage parlor for our tired feet — one hour for only 20RMB! It was my first foot massage, and I was certainly self-conscious about somebody touching my feet & lower legs, but my masseuse made me more comfortable by carrying on a conversation and being relatively attractive.
At the end, I went to find him to give him a tip, but he ended up giving me his name and phone number instead, which made me feel awkward about giving him money right afterward. Someday I shall go back to that place…someday…
MTR back to Hong Kong — we were all dead tired
//
Episode II
Four days later, I went back to Shenzhen, this time with a different group of people. Once again, I was kind of tagging along with no agenda of my own. Laurent, Fiona, Jacqueline [three Canadians] and I took a completely different turn from the first time and went to 世界之窗 [Window to the World], which we more or less randomly chose from Laurent’s guide book. We figured we would spend a few hours there [the book estimated two hours], and go shopping.
Whoever had written the guidebook made a rather grave miscalculation. Window to the World is a humongous park full of miniature [but still sizable] replicas of international landmarks, from Egypt’s pyramids to Thailand’s temples to the garden of Versailles. We spent a good seven hours exploring and taking fun photos, and even caught the surprisingly magnificent nighttime show at the end. The sunshine-filled day was one of the most fun experiences that I’ve had this semester, and it was definitely worth the $20US entrance fee.
After this, the guy taking our photo asked to take one with Laurent LOL
I don’t think we were actually allowed into the garden :(
We waited a LONG time for the little girls before us to get off
It makes a pretty good substitute for the real thing
We fly high like paper planes
I wanted to climb on it so badly!
We were shooting Laurent for indecent underwear flashing
What are ruins good for but an impromptu photoshoot?
//
Episode III
This past Saturday, I traveled across the border with yet another group of friends: Paris, Justin and Cathy. We were supposed to join another group that included Laurent, but they ended up splitting up/going late/all sorts of shenanigans so we left early in the morning without them. Our priority was to shop. Thankfully, Cathy had a place in mind [the rest of us did not plan ahead at all] and we headed to 老街 [“Old Street”?]. It was the first time in Shenzhen for all of them, so Cathy [who is from mainland] and I took turns leading our group.
Justin, me, Cathy, Paris
The first time I went to Shenzhen, the fashions seemed rather poor to me, but this time the mall we went to was extremely chic. A large fraction of the stores sold menswear, which is rare [I saw some amazing D&G sneakers], and unlike the ultra-cheap shopping centers where you can find the shirt you just bought down the hall for $10 cheaper, the styles from store to store all varied.
One thing that I still haven’t gotten the hang of is haggling. Not only do I handle rejection badly [“Can you give it to me for cheaper?” “No.” “…Oh. Okay…”], the way I shop is to fall in love with something at first sight, which means I then have to have it [as long as I can afford it, and in Asia, I usually can]. Besides, unlike the thrill that some people get from forcing a shopkeeper to slash prices, I only experience heightened levels of stress from what I feel like is an evil game designed to wrestle money from somebody who probably needs it more than I do.
At one point, I stopped in a shop to admire a jersey dress, but turned to leave when the shopkeeper told me that it was 300RMB [$43 for a simple dress]. She then pressed me to give her a price I would pay, so I halved the price even though I would’ve only bought the dress for 100RMB or less. In this way, she basically pressured me into bargaining with her even though I felt highly uncomfortable about it [just let me shop in peace!].
America’s Next Top Model is right here, baby
I had been wanting a pair of gold high-tops for a while, so when I spotted them in the men’s section [the women’s styles all had freaking butterflies or were Converse, ick] of a shoe store, I couldn’t resist, even though they were 280RMB. I had a mere 25RMB left in my pocket afterward; Paris & Cathy were pretty much in the same boat. Justin, on the other hand, didn’t want clothes or shoes, so after five or so hours of shopping, we located a salon so he could trim his faux-hawk.
NEW SHOES NEW SHOES
New hat too cuz I’m a gangstaa (not my camera)
All three of them ended up getting their hairs cut while I idly sat by, and then we took our tired feet to a spa. We had originally planned to return to Hong Kong at 9PM, but that goal was unsurprisingly sidelined, forcing us to speedwalk our way through customs like we were Cinderella trying to make curfew. There was a slightly traumatic moment when we ran through the gate to the subway JUST AS IT CLOSED ON THE PEOPLE RIGHT BEHIND US as if they were contaminated and being quarantined o____o it was seriously a scene right out of a zombie movie.
This is the face that gives everyone trouble
LOL MY FRIENDS CAN’T WINK & SMILE
I Love Supporting The Magazine Industry
March 19, 2010 § Leave a comment
I guiltlessly spend money on magazines because in my mind, it’s a circular way of ensuring my own future. These are the ones that I’ve amassed so far in Hong Kong, in order of purchase date:
The first one, CosmoGirl, is from the first week of school when I figured I could use something to peruse when bored and perhaps even improve my Chinese in the process.
This did not happen. I think I’ve flipped through half of the pictures; why would I endure the struggle of piecing together Chinese when I can be more easily entertained by YouTube? At $20HK, this was not a big loss. It is also the only magazine I own that features a woman on the cover [no idea who she is].
After getting to know Rosaline better in the first month of school and discovering our similar interest in Kpop, she gave me a SS501 poster she had received inside a Color magazine [they’re my 2nd fave group]. Intrigued, I picked up my own copy [different issue] not long after.
Mine came with a poster of Lee Minho from Boys Over Flowers, a drama that Rosaline likes, so I gave it to her and now both are affixed to our walls. Color magazine seems to be a pop idol gossip magazine that features SS501 and Super Junior M on its cover every month, along with Fahrenheit and Rainie. It also included cut-out postcards and a fold-out calendar. I suppose the $35HK price tag is worth the gimmicks at least once for a fangirl.
My next purchase was in preparation for my interview with Prestige magazine, where I now have an internship.
This magazine is extremely difficult to find around Hong Kong because its target audience is rich foreigners who read English. I’ve only seen it in Stanley [a place full of white people] and the business part of Wan Chai [where I work]. I decided it would be okay to drop $50HK on this issue to learn more about the magazine. The sad thing is, there were so many extra copies lying around the Prestige office that my editor offered me one for free when I finally went in for my interview.
I did accept the October issue, which is roughly the thickness and weight of a textbook.
I’ve skimmed both of these and even managed to make some grammatical corrections. Most of the content, like any luxury magazine, is completely unrelatable to me.
When I read that [my 3rd fave group] DBSK would be the first male group to appear on the cover of JJ magazine, I dismissed it as trivial until I saw the actual issue in 7-11.
Despite the expensive price [somewhere around $60HK], I had to have it. The original Japanese versions are always more expensive, which meant it cost a lot AND I couldn’t read it even if I actually wanted to. There are some huge, beautiful photos of DBSK inside, and the rest is all clothing modeled by blonde half-Japanese girls.
I’ve been unexpected faced with Nicholas Tse’s image many times in HK because of his new movie. I was literally in love with him in high school, and though I had thought that those feelings died once he got married & had a baby & got ugly, my heart still flutters a little when I look into his eyes on the side of a bus. When I saw the clean-shaven & well dressed version of him on the cover of a magazine at Circle K, I knew I had to buy one eventually.
The next day, I walked into a different Circle K and scanned the shelves. I happened to catch Key peeking out at me like this:
Of course I recognized him even sideways and partially hidden.
At $12HK, Yes! was the cheapest magazine so far, and even came with a free pack of tissues! It featured photos of them having lunch in HK [presumably], arriving at the airport and at the Chinese New Years performance that I attended. Like Color magazine, half of its pages are of the non-glossy variety, which [generally] means its content is even less worth reading than the 100% glossy kind. Seeing physical pictures of SHINee has caused me to realize that Key does indeed wear more eyeliner than the other members. Sigh…I don’t care.
Anyway, I had to go next door to 7-11 to find the Nicholas Tse magazine.
Only $10?? So cheap!
//
At the time I wrote the above content, I had yet to purchase the apex of my collection, which I had my eye on ever since learning about it. DBSK has basically been shoved into every Japanese magazine lately, and Vivi magazine is no exception. The thing is, the special insert of their photoshoot was only available in the [larger & more expensive] Japanese version of the publication, and while exhaustedly browsing 7-11 the day after returning from the Philippines, I accidentally bought the Chinese version. What a waste of $35HK! For I had to have the original, which cost another $68HK.
But it was so worth it.
I didn’t even know that they were also in Non No magazine, which my friend bought during her Reading Week trip to Japan. When I flipped open to the first couple of pages, I found this:
Swooooooooon. The saturation of colors makes these photos incredibly rich & beautiful. I’m still debating whether to drop $60+ on one for myself.
It seems that DBSK is the only Kpop group being featured in magazines these days [maybe it’s not as popular a custom in Korea? No idea], because JaeJoong [MY FAVORITE] will be featured in a solo photoshoot in An An magazine sometime in the near future. This publication is known for its ~sexy images [occasionally crossing the line], so I can’t wait! I only worry how I will carry all these heavy magazines back home :(
Creepers Abound
March 17, 2010 § 1 Comment
At the Argyle Shopping Center with Susan & Valerie, I was leaning over a table of stud earrings looking for a specific design when someone reached over to the earrings beside me, grazing my chest. I barely noticed it since most of the shoppers there are women, but then I noticed that the hand belonged to a guy checking out the studs on the other side of me. Oh well, honest mistake.
It happened again, and this time I took a good look at him. He looked like a typical dude my age, not very creeperly and actually not too shabby looking [in face & wardrobe]. I didn’t say anything but made sure to back away from the table.
After paying for my earrings, I turned to go into the store behind me where Susan was buying some dresses. That guy happened to be in the store too, standing rather close to another girl who I assumed was his girlfriend. She left, though, and he started making chit-chat with us as the cashiers wrapped up Susan’s purchase. Susan was showing me a dress on the rack and the guy indicated the tiniest mini-skirt and said in halting English that it would look cute on her. “It’s way too short; how can anybody wear it?” I responded laughingly, wondering why he was trying to talk to us.
As we were leaving, he stood about a foot away from Susan and said while gaping down her shirt as his face turned red, “You…have a very nice body.” He sped away as we were left in bemusement. Valerie, who had been looking on this whole time, came over and we told her what had transpired. “Yeah, he was staring at both of your chests the whole time,” she said, which propelled us further into cringe territory.
His actions were obviously inappropriate, but we were so unprepared for this kind of situation that we couldn’t react in time to prevent it. Also, we’re simply not used to having to stand up for ourselves like that. But this is wrong: the next creeper deserves at least a reprimand if not a slap on the face.
Similar instances happen everywhere. I’ve been taking the same bus to work for a while now, and half the time it’s the same driver. Monday morning he stopped right in front of me, and I as prepared to greet him with a smile when I got on the bus, but he was clearly more interested in looking at my chest. Whatever…
I think part of the reason I’m not completely freaked out by the gaping is that I do it too, to guys who have particularly nice biceps or pants that nicely accentuate their bottoms. I’m a creeper too! But never a lewd one.
auradis 