Here’s To The Little Guys
July 24, 2011 § Leave a comment
The trailers for Captain America were enough to rouse my enthusiasm for yet another Marvel superhero movie. For starters, I am a total Chris Evans fan. His muscular physique and tender blue eyes framed by magnificently long eyelashes make him delightful to watch on the big screen, and he did not disappoint. However, the more I think about this movie, the less impressed I am by it.
As most should know, Evans starts out as a scrawny man cursed with the asthmatic body of a 14-year-old boy. I know that the first half of the movie was establishing his good character, but it was so pitiful. I found the grenade scene overdone and contrived. I suppose the biggest complaint is that Steve Rogers is too simple. He’s even less tortured than Superman, who’s as vanilla as they come. I know I shouldn’t expect too much from a movie like this, but that doesn’t keep me from desiring more.
Though some might disagree, I think that the movie got better [but not by too much] after the transformation. Evans’ pecs seriously rippled as he sprinted barefoot down the street — ladies, it was a delight. Still, the image of his digitalized, creepily puny self is hard to shake from my mind. I’m curious to see what his body double looks like.
I soon realized that despite being psyched to see this film, I really knew nothing about Captain America, his origin or abilities. And along those lines, I couldn’t tell if it was lazy writing or just being true to the comic, but what’s unfortunate is how tired and cliché the whole plot is, almost every aspect of it. Villain bent on taking over the world via some superhuman source of energy and ignoring the feeble moral protests of the scientists he exploited, the good guy doing typical good guy things like suddenly gaining super-intelligent tactical abilities…yawn.
Speaking of the villain, I really hate it when foreigners inexplicably speak heavily accented English. If it will add to the authenticity and believability of the movie, I would gladly just hear German and read subtitles. Although then I suppose the hero and villain wouldn’t really be able to communicate during the final battle. BUT STILL..!
More, please
There are quite a few no-nose villains in theaters these days. [Lesson learned: If you don’t have a nose, you will not win!] I’m not sure why the serum made the villain’s skin loose enough to go parading around like Darth Maul, but it was weird. And his Hydra grunts look like they came straight out of Tron, with blue lasers and everything.
The explosion/takeover montage was like watching a video game trailer, and that’s not a compliment. As AC remarked to me after the movie, the editing in certain parts seemed rather poorly done. I suppose there aren’t that many options when your hero just punches people and flings his shield around, the action wasn’t that spectacular, and we even watched it in 3D. As is usually the case, I can’t say that the 3D was worth it. A second pair of glasses sitting awkwardly on the tip of my nose, my face muscles tensed to keep them from slipping off…
Kenneth Choi’s role was really something though. He had funny lines [or maybe it was just one]! He didn’t have to speak with an accent! And he didn’t even play the stereotypical nerdy or perverted or half-naked/insane character! It’s a veritable miracle for Asian Americans everywhere!
Despite my negative comments, I still enjoyed this movie, and the ending [plus the post-credits ending] was the perfect way to segue into next summer’s Avenger’s movie. There will be so many beautiful men on the screen I won’t know what to do with myself…somebody help me!
God Of Thunder
May 8, 2011 § 3 Comments
I wanted to watch Thor because I thought it would be a solid action movie after the mild disappointment that was Fast Five. Thor seemed unique — very rarely do we get movies based on Norse myths, and having done no research except watching the trailer on TV, I had no idea this was a Marvel production. So I went into the movie with no expectations except to be entertained.
After watching it, though, I’d say that Thor was a bit of slapstick comedy combined with a lot of hot mess.
First of all, I forgot [or never knew] that Natalie Portman was in this movie. After all the hullabaloo with the Oscars and the ballet, I’m frankly tired of seeing her face everywhere despite having watched neither Black Swan nor No Strings Attached. My affection for her is waning in tandem with my love for James Franco.
Anyway. The main problem with Thor was that it tried to incorporate too much, which made for a baffling and sometimes incoherent narrative. There’s the brother vs. brother drama. Father vs. sons drama. Abduction and self-hatred drama. That random race of frost-giants drama. That frustratingly inexplicable split-second romance. The group of federal agents whose presence and purpose are never explained. How Natalie Portman is following sky-static in the middle of New Mexico with poly-sci major Kat Dennings and her dad’s old bud and is somehow getting college credit. And what exactly was that glowing blue cube??
Everything is just piled on, and I can understand that they tried to pour in so much in order to help the plot move along, but it was just too much. B even fell asleep on my shoulder for half an hour and essentially didn’t miss much.
Can I also point out the racism in this movie? The only Asian person in the whole film speaks with an accent. It would be fine except HE’S FROM ASGARD, the mythical realm in which EVERYBODY ELSE speaks with a Viking accent [LOL I don’t know how to describe it exactly]. I mean, I get that Tadanobu Asano is a Japanese actor and that’s probably just how he normally speaks English, but the perpetual foreigner thing really grates my nerves.
At one point during the second half of the movie, one of the secret agents sees the group of four warriors strolling down the quaint New Mexico street and mutters into his walkie-talkie, “We’ve got Xena, Jackie Chan,” and some other description I’ve since forgotten. It was funny — the theater laughed, because it was mostly true. I get the Xena reference; Jaimie Alexander played a female warrior who was dressed like this:
But what about this looks like Jackie Chan?? [Note that the agent was standing on a rooftop, so all he could really see was the hair/costume.]
It’s because he’s Asian, isn’t it? It’s the equivalent of calling a black guy Chris Rock just because he’s black.
The frost-giants looked like they were styled after the Green Goblin. It’s always interesting to see just how much a movie will make an alien look like a deformed humanoid. I get that we’re limited in our scope of imagination, but do foreign species really just have to look like people with acute epidermodysplasia verruciformis [I don’t know how to pronounce it either]?
I was surprised to see that Kenneth Branagh directed this film. I remember watching his many Shakespeare films in middle & high school English classes. Good to see that he’s moved on to bigger and better productions!
Lastly, let it be noted [once again] that I have a thing for blondes with icy blue eyes, so let’s take a moment to appreciate Chris Hemsworth in all his squinty Taylor-Swift-esque glory:
[Movie stills courtesy of Yahoo! Movies.]
I Am Not A Program
December 30, 2010 § 1 Comment
I haven’t blogged about any movies recently, and this is partly because I haven’t been to a theater in a while and also party because none of the movies I’ve seen recently have given me time to gather my thoughts about the movie while it was still playing. Enter Tron Legacy, which I watched in 3D with the extra pair of glasses slipping off my face.
It took me a while to see this movie because I didn’t know if I wanted to. All the hype put me off, the reviews were bad, and I wasn’t very into the original Tron. Finally though, my curiosity got the best of me, and I figured that I needed to watch this in a theater while I had the chance.
Welcome to the Grid, kid.
This review might contain a few spoilers; I’ve tried to keep it as vague as possible, but then again, if you’re worried about the plot being spoiled for you, you’re probably setting your standards too high. I didn’t expect the storyline to be spectacular, but I didn’t expect it to try so hard either. It’s hard to take this film seriously, and I can’t figure out if it wants us to at all.
Films with weak plots leave me with more questions than Inception did. For example, why is the character of Tron so obviously the ONLY one who can wield two discs? Why do programs watch other programs fight each other? What real-life technological situation is this supposed to simulate?
Zoom zoom zoom
Before Tron Legacy begins, it tells us that some of the movie is shown in 2D because that’s how it was shot and “meant to be viewed” or something like that. Why did I pay to watch a movie in 3D if only half of it is? Shouldn’t I just pay half of the inflated 3D price? This whole 3D fad had better be pulling the movie industry out of the slump it seemed to be in a few years ago, because it definitely isn’t benefitting my budget a whole lot.
The acting is stilted and the script is rather shoddy. At one point, when Flynn and Quorra are staring out into the darkness by the pool, Flynn turns away and declares, “Chaos. Good news.” Maybe I just wasn’t paying enough attention, but it was just so…random. We couldn’t help but laugh.
The actor who plays the Sam Flynn, Garrett Hedlund, has a stupefied, wide-eyed expression the whole time, but at least his crying is good. There are a lot of gratuitous shots of Olivia Wilde — tilting her head slowly, stretched out on the couch, staring at things — they’re pretty and pretty useless. I thought I saw a really hot Cillian Murphy in the conference room at the beginning of the film, but since he’s not listed in the credits, I can’t figure out who it is.
Whatcha thinkin’ ’bout? Nothing?
Of course, it’s not hard to get into the action; it pretty much looks like the most awesome video game EVER. The neon stripes, the glowing lights, the immaculately clean lines, etc. The racing scenes were so good; I wish there were more of them. Everybody speaks with autotune, which would definitely be a hit in the American music industry. The soundtrack fit the film perfectly, and it’s hilariously cute that Daft Punk played the DJs in the club scene.
At times this movie is similar to Narnia’s The Lion, The Witch & The Wardrobe: The Creator is on the run from the corrupted entity who is hellbent on evil & is raising an army of destruction…but what exactly is the destiny Clu talks about? To invade the real world and digitalize it? Can his minions be destroyed there? Would they be invincible?
My questions are many, but they don’t really affect the visual experience. Afterward, my mind was reeling from the movie, and it felt amazing just to drive home while listening to good music [in my case, MGMT].
What’s Your Dream?
November 25, 2010 § Leave a comment
I detest the American movie industry for using 3D to squeeze more money out of consumers. Sure, Avatar was great, Alice In Wonderland was mediocre, but I’m sure I could’ve done without 3D in both. But it’s becoming unavoidable, and thankfully the new-ish theater in Naperville has $3 Wednesday specials for college students…to which another $3 was added because of the 3D. Sigh.
She wields a frying pan à la Princess Peach in Super Smash Bros. Coincidence? LOVE.
Anyway, this all leads me to my thoughts on Disney’s Tangled. I knew from seeing the preliminary sketches [last year? Years ago?] that I wanted to see this film. As I’ve mentioned before, Rapunzel is my favorite fairy tale, and now that I’m home, I have images from the picture book that I used to read over and over again.
She’s SO pretty. I was enamored.
The stories are different [in book version, Rapunzel’s love interest is the royal, not vice versa, and the old lady is an evil witch bent on revenge] but end pretty much in the same way.
Naturally, I LOVED the movie. The artistic design is amazingly beautiful, and although I’m still unconvinced as to the ultimate usefulness of 3D, I would say that the effects enhanced the animations. You can tell from the visual details that Disney didn’t try to half-ass this one.
Rapunzel is absolutely GORGEOUS. The male protagonist, Flynn, is also absurdly attractive, and together they make the most beautiful couple that I’ve ever seen on the big screen. [They’re currently battling Aurora/Philip as best-looking animated duo in my mind.] Seriously, though, her huge green eyes, his perfectly sculpted profile and slim hips, her obviously flawless golden hair…I could go on and on but that would probably creep out normal people.
Not the best picture, but you get the idea. All photos from Yahoo!’s gallery!
The storyline has elements from The Little Mermaid, Cinderella, Sleeping Beauty, Aladdin, Enchanted, and many others, I’m sure. They were familiar concepts but didn’t feel recycled. It was as if Disney learned from their greatest films and used the best parts of all of them. The cute parts were SO cute, and the musical numbers were enjoyable, especially “Mother Knows Best.”
Rapunzel is a more realistic, lovable character. She’s talented, earnest, honest, and has ninja-like capabilities with her hair. The antagonist is depicted as a human character and not simply an old witch with inexplicable magical powers. Flynn’s character was extremely cookie-cutter, but honestly he was so good-looking that I could look past it……
A relationship I could actually believe in. (Overbearing mother? I CAN RELATE.)
I could keep blabbering, but you should just go watch it. The only criticism I recall is that the character of the horse is a bit too much. I mean, it was certainly amusing, but they took the character a little too far. In any case, this movie demonstrates that Disney can still be a healthy competitor for Pixar. I just want to watch it again and again!
How beautiful is this?! I just want to hang it up on my wall. It didn’t actually appear in the finished movie, though.
auradis 